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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27020875">Back Home</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrettseyBr/pseuds/BrettseyBr'>BrettseyBr</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Chicago Fire</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>#brettsey, F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 16:14:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,450</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27020875</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrettseyBr/pseuds/BrettseyBr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
      <p>This idea does not leave my head, after seeing some posts on twitter I had to write .. The timeline will not make much sense as well as the order of events, I'm just fitting to fit the story.  English is not my first language, so I'm sorry for spelling mistakes ... I hope you like it!</p>
    </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sylvie Brett &amp; Matthew Casey, Sylvie Brett/Matthew Casey</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>95</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This idea does not leave my head, after seeing some posts on twitter I had to write .. The timeline will not make much sense as well as the order of events, I'm just fitting to fit the story.  English is not my first language, so I'm sorry for spelling mistakes ... I hope you like it!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Back home</p>
<p> </p>
<p> It had been six weeks since Brett decided to request a transfer.</p>
<p> It all started with Gabby's sudden departure.  She loved her partner and friend, when she gradually saw her going from happy and fulfilled to sad and frustrated.  Something was missing for her, and after a little argument between them, Brett found himself getting a new partner.  Foster was the opposite, relaxed, more lively, but very good paramedic just like his ex partner.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> After a long time, almost two years to be exact, things were practically in place, something unexpected (not to say much) happened.</p>
<p> It took Brett a long time to understand her feelings for Casey, even longer to accept and when she finally thought it might not be a bad thing, coming back from a call with both of them she sees her standing, surrounded by most of the team, smiling warmly at everyone  too intrested in the conversation to notice</p>
<p> her arrival, there she was, oozing sympathy and her perfect beauty, Gabriela Dawson.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> Not that she wasn't happy to see her happy, or anything, she just didn't expect to see Casey smiling back, excited and happy.</p>
<p> But he should be, my God, they were married, there is a whole story, she shouldn't feel that way, that was wrong, and she knew she had to do something.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> That same day she filled out the transfer form.  She learned that house 20 was in need of a paramedic and did not hesitate to place herself to fill the vacancy.</p>
<p> It was the most difficult thing she ever did after moving to Chicago.  She had Battalion 51 as her family, but after seeing how happy they were with Gabby's return and how they hoped she and Matt ... Casey, if they resolved, she knew she couldn't be there.  It would not be she who would disappoint everyone, it was increasingly difficult to hide her feelings and even though it sometimes seemed that they were returned by Casey, after seeing him smiling and happy, she knew she needed to get out of the way.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> It was difficult to tell her friends, especially since she couldn't tell the truth.  Stella and Foster were the only ones who knew, and despite being very reluctant and trying to change her mind, they ended up giving in.</p>
<p> Sylvie told them that when you really like someone, you want their happiness, and that may include you in it or not.  And that was what she was doing, Casey deserved to be happy, after all, they both deserved it.  And she, well, she would handle it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> Chief Bolden was the most difficult to accept, it would be an understatement to say that he was surprised to receive the transfer request, but it was even worse when he said that the family should not be separated.  She wanted to tell him, but it seemed so silly, so immature.  After all, how to tell the truth, how to tell the one who had welcomed and taught her so much during all these years that her heart had been treacherous and that she had fallen in love with her best friend and captain?  How to say that she was not strong enough to live in the same space?  She just said that she felt she needed new air.  Losing her birth mother, and so many other things had moved her a lot and she needed to reconnect, that's what she told him.  Bolden was silent, holding the transfer paper, his saddened countenance was breaking Sylvie's heart.  But in the end he said he understood, and that house 20 would be very lucky to have someone like her.  He also said that the doors of 51 were open for her, and as soon as she decided to return, all she had to do was ask.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> The last shift in the house was difficult.  She gave everyone the same excuse, said she would see them at Molly's, and that it wouldn't be so bad.</p>
<p> To be honest, she had decided to reconsider after spending the night in tears crying, but when she saw Gabby inside the room talking to Casey behind closed doors she knew she had to continue with the plan and the plan was to forget about Matt.</p>
<p> She knew that to do that she would have to break the first part of the deal with the folks at Molly's at night, she needed to get away from everything that reminded her of him, and seeing him on his nights off would certainly not help at all  .  It was for the good of all.  Gabby and Casey were already a couple when she arrived, they were already a family when she came in and it wouldn't be fair to screw that up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> She thought for most of the afternoon to talk to him.  Not that he didn't know about the transfer, but she wanted to say goodbye.  They've been close for the past few months and he helped her so much when she needed it, it wouldn't be fair for her to just leave.  He was not to blame for her feelings, he was not to blame for making her hyperventilate with just a smile.</p>
<p> But whenever she came near her door, she lost her courage.  What would she say?  They were too close, their level of friendship was different, he was not going to buy the story she had told everyone.</p>
<p> Luckily a call that needed the whole house had occupied them until hours after the end of the shift.  Everyone was so tired and ready to go home that they seemed to forget that it was her last shift there and she couldn't be more grateful, she wouldn't have to say goodbye, she didn't want to, she couldn't.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "So, is that so? Last shift?"  - He looked tired, more than that, he looked sad.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> She was on her back, opening the car door when he arrived, and when he turned, the look he was directing at her was as or more painful than that of Chief Bolden.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "Yes, but it's not a big deal, Casey. Let's keep seeing each other, I mean… I'll keep seeing all of you. They're still my friends, my family" - She said almost without stopping to breathe, running her hair behind her ear to disguise  nervousness, without being able to look him in the eye.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> " It is not a big deal?"  - He said a little louder.  "I thought we were friends, Sylvie. I thought we were ... Well, no matter what I thought, I probably got it wrong. I hope you're happy in your new home."</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "Casey I…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "Okay, Sylvie, just take care of yourself. See you around."</p>
<p> </p>
<p> He left without giving her time or space to respond.  He was hurt, but so was she.  What right did he have when all she was doing was for him to be happy, for that smile to be kept on his face, for him to have the family he dreamed about so much. But that's when she remembered, he didn't know  , did not know the size of the pain that was in his heart, or the hours he spent crying and that probably will still pass.  He didn't know that hurting him just so he could be happy was the hardest thing she had ever done.  One day maybe he would know, maybe when she can get rid of those feelings, if that is possible, she can come home.  But for now, she was going to swallow the crying, at least in front of people and was going to stick with the plan.  She was strong, she had no other choice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> After a few weeks, things got easier, no, not easier, they became sustainable.  The first shifts had been the worst.  Being in a different barracks with different people was strange.  Even though she had already covered some shifts there, it was different.  The house routine was different, she was again the "newbie" in a new battalion.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> She hadn't been to Molly's since she left 51, she already planned that.  But refusing invitations and making excuses for his friends was getting harder and harder.  She missed them, even though she still lived with Foster and if she updated everything, it wasn't the same thing and it was still painful.</p>
<p> Foster talked a lot about the new partner at Ambo, Mackey, according to her, was a wonderful person, playful and very good at what she did.  Sometimes when hearing the stories of Foster, Sylvie felt a twinge of jealousy, it was as if no one missed her, but then she received a message and saw how much she was loved which made things even more difficult.  Herrmann sent several messages saying that Molly's was not the same without her and that her Rosé was picking up dust from the stock.  Severide texted telling her to stop tantruming and come back to them (it was her way of saying she was homesick), Mouch also texted, damn it, even Capp and Tonny texted saying they missed her.  Only one person hadn't sent anything, Casey.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> That was the plan, wasn't it?  Get away, heal and come back.  But it didn't seem to be working.  Every time her phone indicated a new message she created an expectation that it might be him.  Being away from him made her think more of him than when they were close.</p>
<p> She knew from Foster that Gabby had returned to Puerto Rico and that this matter had not been touched upon by anyone else, she also knew that he was in a bad mood, always locked in his dormitory and leaning over his paperwork when his presence was not required.  And she felt guilty for that, well, it might have nothing to do with her leaving, but even so she hoped from the bottom of her heart that one day he would understand why everything was.  For now she would stick to the plan.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> That was until recently, when they were told that 51 people would spend the shift with them, something about an infestation.</p>
<p> It couldn't be real, it was so difficult to stay away from everyone, especially him and now they would share the same environment again?  It seems that destiny or whatever, is in order to play with it.  A feeling of panic came over you, what would it be like, how would they react?  It wasn't something she could just find an excuse for, she was afraid, afraid to face her family, afraid to face Mattew Casey.</p>
<p> She was so tired and frustrated with everything that she feared she would lose focus and end up revealing the truth.  She wanted to be with them, she wanted to go to Molly's, she wanted to be the friendly shoulder for him but she couldn't.  She no longer had that strength, she wished she could run without looking back, facing them would be as difficult as getting away.  Ah if she could go back in time and try even harder to stop these feelings ...</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "Yeah, and here we go" - Violet said, apparently not very happy either, indicating the arrival of vehicles that she knew very well.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "Yes, it can be fun."  - Sylvie used all her self control to put a half smile on her face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "Partner, I think you better try again, you didn't even cheat me, who's to say."  - Violet said with a knowing look.  "Come on, let's pretend that both need to be stocked and that we need to take inventory again" - She winked at Sylvie.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "You don't think it's better to greet them"</p>
<p> </p>
<p> "We will have time for that, Brett, for now I am taking care of my partner and myself to be honest."</p>
<p> </p>
<p> Sylvie knew she was postponing the inevitable, but as soon as she saw a captain stepping out of the car, running his hand through his hair, just to put the cap back on, something so simple that it moved her so much. She knew that putting it off might not be such a bad idea.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Scare</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>It took more than I intended, but writing in another language is a little more difficult than it seems lol .. Anyway, some dialogues are stuck in my head and I need to put them here, I hope you like it ... Ah, I loved it  comments and I promise to answer them all.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been a while since Brett followed Violet under the excuse of taking both of her inventory.</p><p> They had already done and redone everything that was needed and no calls came.  From where he was, Brett could see Hitter, Gallo and Herrmann talking against the truck and noticed something in the air, his new partner was agitated, avoiding getting out of the ambulance as much as she did.</p><p> </p><p> Sylvie was never one to get involved in someone's life, but Violet seemed tense, she was quiet and it wasn't very normal.  Since she reached home 20, one of the first people she got along with was Violet, despite being a more reserved and somewhat competitive person, Brett couldn't say he was so different from her, perhaps without the competition part.  She was very good at the calls and had no trouble listening or asking in any situation where Sylvie was more skilled.  She really was a good person, it wasn't Foster, and she still missed her partner and friend a lot, but it wasn't too bad to be with Violet either.  Something that Sylvie was very grateful for, because it was already very difficult to deal with the longing and the confused feelings that were hovering over her.</p><p> </p><p> "Hey, are you okay?"  Brett asked a little cautiously.</p><p> </p><p> "Yes…" - Violet replied without looking directly at her.</p><p> </p><p> " Yes?"</p><p> </p><p> "Okay, I'll tell you if you do."</p><p> </p><p> "Me? ... Tell what?"</p><p> </p><p> "Ah, come on Brett, you didn't think twice about coming when I pulled you here. I know you get along with everyone, it must be something big for you to want to change houses and get away."</p><p> </p><p> Sylvie froze, not knowing what to say.  She hadn't said anything different than what she said to her friends here, too.  "a lot going on, changing airs" and all the same excuses.</p><p> </p><p> "You don't have to say it if you don't want to. But I think I have an idea."</p><p> </p><p> "What would it be?"  - She couldn't resist the curiosity to know what Violet was thinking.</p><p> </p><p> "Well, you changed houses, you don't go to Molly's anymore, you talk a lot about the 51 people, but you hardly talk about the captain, my guess is that there is something there."</p><p> </p><p> Damn it!  She should have let it go when Violet suggested she didn't have to say it.  And now?  How to get out of this?</p><p> </p><p> "You can be very observant"</p><p> </p><p> "That's what they say… I don't speak much, I pay attention to everything, a lot! I really don't know him well, but he seems to be a good person, I don't understand why so much effort to get away."</p><p> </p><p> "It's more complicated than it looks."</p><p> </p><p> "There it is !!! I knew I was right. But I understand if you don't want to share. As a deal is a deal, I'm running from Gallo."</p><p> </p><p> "Yeah, that was a little bit obvious, but back to you, Gallo is a good person."</p><p> </p><p> "I know, that's the problem. I'm very complicated Brett, being together with him is incredible, but I always end up disagreeing with something. It seems that since the academy we are in an endless dispute, I know that a lot of it is mine  guilt, but I can't help it. "</p><p> </p><p> "It doesn't have to be like that, I bet you can get it right. These weeks I've seen you stop and listen to me several times, accepting opinions is a start, I don't think it's something you can't manage, if you like each other, you should  try."</p><p> </p><p> Violet was quiet for a while, considering what Sylvie had said and then started to laugh.</p><p> </p><p> " What?"  - Brett was confused by the smile of the partner.</p><p> </p><p> "Did you even hear yourself?"</p><p> </p><p> Before she could respond, alarms went off calling all vehicles.</p><p> </p><p> The scene was not one of the best, when they arrived they saw cpd cars stopped there and Voight who was pacing from side to side.  The head of intelligence being on a call never meant something "good".</p><p> It turned out that it was a suspect that when he found himself surrounded, he took a woman with his two children hostage, and during the negotiation he threatened to set the apartment on fire.</p><p> </p><p> While they were making a plan, shots were fired, ambulance 99 ended up being the only vehicle hit as they were in front of the apartment window.</p><p> </p><p> "Breeet" - Casey shouted and disobeying Voight who asked them to stay where they were, started to move towards him.</p><p> </p><p> Sylvie and Violet bent down to try to protect themselves.  Violet managed to get out on the driver's side but Sylvie could not find a position, so that she could get out she would have to lift up a little which was not very suitable since one of the shots had broken the window leaving her even more unprotected.</p><p> </p><p> Casey realizing the situation without being able to reach Sylvie, returned and got into one of the trucks, in a quick exchange of looks with Halsted he turned on the sirens, distracting the sniper while Voight gave orders for his men to enter the house.</p><p> Halsted ran to the ambulance helping Sylvie to get out and while they were protecting themselves hidden behind the trucks they could hear the shots that sounded loudly from inside the residence.  It seemed to last for hours but in fact it was minutes, Upton brought two children, a little boy of about 3 years old and a girl of at most 8 years old.</p><p> Casey wanted to go to where she was, for a moment he had even forgotten how upset he was, seeing her totally unprotected becoming a target made him put his hurt aside.  But he didn't have time, soon they saw smoke coming from the apartment and while he saw her recover quickly, already holding one of the children, he put on his helmet and entered the building.  Out of the corner of her eye she saw him run into the small building and felt her heart sink, she had heard him shout his name as the man was shooting at them, she saw his worried countenance when she left the ambulance and it broke her still  more.</p><p> </p><p> She was trying to reassure the younger child when they heard a loud noise and when looking towards the window where a few minutes ago someone almost killed her, they could only see a lot of smoke.</p><p> </p><p> "He turned on the gas" - The girl said startled.</p><p> </p><p> "What did you say dear?" - Brett lowered himself to the child's level to talk.</p><p> </p><p> "The boy, he turned on the gas"</p><p> </p><p> "Boss !!! Sylvie shouted from where he was." Boss, the gas, he turned on the gas. "- As soon as she said a big bang it was heard.</p><p> </p><p> "Casey, Casey, answer ... Severide" - Bolden shouted over the radio, anxious walking from side to side.  The apartment had exploded, putting the entire structure of the building at risk.</p><p> "Casey, answer!"</p><p> </p><p> Violet looked at Sylvie who was now shaking, she tried to stay professional and kept trying to calm the children who were now screaming for their mother who had not yet been removed from the building.</p><p> </p><p> "Casey, Severide ... Respond".</p><p> </p><p> "Burgess, Atwater ... You can hear me" - From where you were, you could hear Voight as worried as Bolden shouting over the radio.</p><p> </p><p> "Mommy… Where's Mommy?"</p><p> </p><p> "Calm down, dear, the bravest boys are there with her." - Sylvie wanted to say that everything was going to be okay, but she didn't know.  All she wanted to do was see them come through the doorway safe and alive.</p><p> </p><p> After a few minutes that felt like hours, Bolden's radio sounded the most beautiful voice in Sylvie's ears.</p><p> </p><p> "Boss! We managed to get into the apartment next door and protect ourselves, but I don't know if the building will hold up, there are more people here, at least four more families," Casey informed.</p><p> </p><p> "Very well, we will do what we were trained"</p><p> </p><p> Bolden asked Sylvie and Violet to take the two children to the med just to comply with the protocol, as they were without visible injuries, the 61 would follow closely behind with the mother while the men of 51 and 20 took turns to get people out of the building.</p><p> She didn't see him, but she heard his voice and knowing that they were okay, that he was alive made her stop shaking and regain her composure.</p><p> </p><p> When they were leaving the med they were told that everything was under control and were ordered to return to the battalion for the concert by the window.</p><p> They had been in the barracks for some time when everyone arrived.  They looked exhausted, but they had that winning face on their faces.  It was always like that when they left a dangerous connection without any of them being hurt.</p><p> Sylvie and Lin were close to the ambulance following the concert when they spotted the brave men and women of the corporation entering.  Cruz, Hitter, Capp, Tonny and Gallo were laughing, saying something about Casey breaking down a door.</p><p> Mouch and Herrmann came in with Georgios and Vasquez from house 20, talking about lunch.</p><p> Severide, the captain and the captain of the 20 were talking to Bolden and Stella and Foster came towards him, but Casey was out of sight.</p><p> </p><p> "Girl, you scared us! How lucky that all we have today is a dislocated shoulder and a broken window" - Foster said approaching where they were.</p><p> </p><p> "Who hurt your shoulder?"  Sylvie asked.</p><p> </p><p> "Apparently Casey thought it was Captain America and dropped a door with his shoulder" - Foster said laughing.</p><p> </p><p> "Casey? Is he okay? Where is he?"</p><p> </p><p> "Subtle Brett, Subtle" - Violet said softly tapping her shoulder on Sylvie's shoulder.</p><p> </p><p> "He's fine, Mackey is looking at his shoulder, since he's stubborn and doesn't want to go to the med."  - Foster and Stella looked at each other, Sylvie's face didn't go unnoticed.</p><p> </p><p> Mackey?  Why would she be checking on him?  And why not Foster or the hell, why not her?  She tried her best to disguise it, but maybe it was impossible, jealousy was stamped on her face, especially now when Casey came in smiling along with the "Mackey".</p><p> </p><p> "Is something wrong, friend?"  Stella asked when Sylvie blushed in three different shades of red.</p><p> </p><p> "No! Why would there be? I'm glad everyone is fine."  - But there was, she already felt jealous when Foster told about the new partner, but now seeing Casey smile with her, that feeling was even greater, yes!  She was jealous!  It wasn't even two hours ago that both of them could have died and he didn't even look at her when he entered.  Well, maybe it was a good sign.  Nobody said it would be easy or it wouldn't hurt.</p><p> </p><p> Violet made some excuse and went inside, leaving the girls alone outside.</p><p> Stella opened her arms and hugged Sylvie tightly.  "Wow, I haven't seen you in ages."</p><p> </p><p> "It must be because it does"</p><p> </p><p> "It's not even that much for Foster, we live in the same place"</p><p> </p><p> "Yeah, but I almost never see you. I don't know, Sylvie, I still think your plan is very stupid"</p><p> </p><p> "This again? I already said that it is necessary. Look at me, you two, I love you! Nothing has changed."</p><p> </p><p> "Except for you to run and pretend you were taking inventory when we arrived" - Foster said.</p><p> </p><p> " As?.."</p><p> </p><p> "How do I know? How long have Sylvie worked together? I've seen you do everything you needed to do in 20 minutes and it took you hours. I don't know if being away from your family will help you. For me you're creating problems where they don't have to.  "</p><p> </p><p> "Brett" - A familiar voice called from behind, and Sylvie couldn't help her heart racing.</p><p> </p><p> "Casey, hi" - Her hand went to the watch's strap, it was automatic when she was nervous.</p><p> </p><p> " Can I talk to you?"</p><p> </p><p> "I'm going to see what they have for lunch, I'm hungry. Are you coming, Foster?"  - Stella winked at Sylvie and left smiling.</p><p> </p><p> "Sure, I already said what I needed, see if you think about it all" - Foster said and left.</p><p> </p><p> Casey walked a little further behind the truck, and Sylvie followed, trying to get some privacy.  "So, you are good?"  -He kept some distance from her, he seemed cautious.</p><p> </p><p> "Yes, and you? I heard about the shoulder."  - It was horrible, she felt that there were several houses behind in her friendship with him.  They were speaking as if they were mere colleagues, their greatest fear was this.  The plan to get away from him now was doing the exact opposite, she wanted to keep their friendship, but it seemed to be making things worse.  Maybe Foster was right, maybe she was creating a bigger problem than what she was trying to avoid.</p><p> </p><p> "Ah, yes" - He rubbed his left shoulder.  "Mackey took a look and asked only to freeze"</p><p> </p><p> "Mackey?"</p><p> </p><p> "Yes, she is great! Haven't you met her yet?"</p><p> </p><p> "No, maybe I have the chance now at lunch."</p><p> </p><p> "You're going to like her! The guys say she reminds Gabby of both."</p><p> </p><p> Great, everything she needed to hear.  "Good! This is good, right?"</p><p> </p><p> "Well, under the circumstances, it's good."</p><p> </p><p> Circumstances, what circumstances?  She wanted to ask, but again she stopped and just smiled.</p><p> </p><p> "Well, I'm glad Brett is fine, I was worried, we'll see you around. I'll freeze my arm before it gets worse and I'm forced to go to the med."</p><p> </p><p> Brett ... She hated to hear him call her that in a conversation like that was just Sylvie in the old days.  "Yes, it's a good idea. Anything, if you need anything, just tell me."</p><p> </p><p> " Sure, thank you "</p><p> </p><p> He was different, distant, he looked a lot like the Casey she met when she arrived at 51. Cool, knight, but reserved.  And she knew it was her fault, going through the days was difficult, but going through a day like today was a thousand times worse.</p><p> </p><p> All she wanted to do was face up to her problems and go back to her friends, but seeing them today, made her think that maybe she has no friends to go back to and because of her alone.</p><p> The rest of the shift went smoothly, despite Foster's words and also the way Casey treated her that they were hammering in her head.</p><p> Anyway, she met Mackey and despite the sudden jealousy earlier, Sylvie still liked her.  Talking to her, she understood why the boys thought she resembled Gabby.  She was fearless and didn't seem to bow her head to anything, to be honest Sylvie always admired that in Gabby, the tough and fearless way and Mackey seemed to have a lot of it.</p><p> The new paramedic asked several questions, also said something that somehow comforted her heart.  She told Sylvie that in a conversation with Herrmann he had said that if she were to be in Sylvie's place she would have to work hard to reach it, Mackey seemed not to care about the comment and said he was happy to meet her.  A pity was that there was not much time to talk because with 99 being repaired most calls came to 61.</p><p> </p><p> The extra free time for Sylvie provided that she could talk to her friends, she sat down with Mouch and saw something on TV, just to spend some time with him.  He talked to Gallo and Hitter, stopping to see some recent photos from Tuesday.  He spent some time with Capp and Tonny too.  Severide did not fail to give her that knowing look, the one that said "go fix this".  She just hadn't said much to Herrmann and she wanted it, she looked for him until she found him outside.</p><p> </p><p> "Hey Herrmann, how are things?" - She said approaching the lieutenant who was leaning against the vehicle.</p><p> </p><p> "I am, and you, girl? We missed you at Molly's"</p><p> </p><p> "I'm sorry Herrmann, it has been a little difficult to reconcile things."</p><p> </p><p> "And why do you mean to leave us?"</p><p> </p><p> "I… I didn't abandon you."</p><p> </p><p> "Brett, look at everything that happened today. We almost lose each other every shift. When I leave the house, I say goodbye to Cindy as if I'm not going to see her again. I hope that I will and that it will be just another shift.  but we can’t guarantee it. Each call is unique, and it can also be the last. Molly’s isn’t just a bar, it’s not just about drinking, it’s about being together, celebrating another day or enjoying the last. It seems a little dramatic, but  look how it was with Shay, one day we drank together and the next day we were at her wake. We are a family and you are part of it, the Sylvie family doesn’t leave, the family helps and stays together. Whatever your problem we can  help you. And just to make it clear .. "He said closing his jacket already moving towards the entrance of the battalion, moving away from the paramedic.  "We wouldn't judge you, or you ..." - He left and left a very thoughtful Sylvie Brett.  Had she been in a hurry to judge them?  Herrmann was right in everything he said.  But how to fix things now?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>That's it, I think we will have a few more chapters, let me know what you think.  Thank you all for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chaos</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well, it took me a little longer than I intended to update, but I confess that writing this scene was not very easy .. I explain some things in the course of the chapters and remembering that I am not following the schedule of the series, so some moments may be reversed  ..</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chaos!<br/>
The word that fit now was this, chaos.<br/>
A week had passed since they were forced to work and sleep under the same roof, and here Battalion 51 and 20 were working side by side again.</p><p> A huge fire in a mattress factory had lasted most of the day.  Firefighters came and went with workers who had been trapped inside the factory when the fire started.<br/>
Although it was still daylight and sunlight was still present, all around it was only smoke and flames that mixed with the giroflex of ambulances and trucks.<br/>
The paramedic teams took turns moving the victims to and from the nearby hospitals, while firefighters continued to bring in more and more people.</p><p> "Chief, we got word that there are at least twenty more people downstairs" - Captain Casey's voice came over the radio.</p><p> "Casey, you have a maximum of 20 minutes, I need everyone to leave."</p><p> "I know, boss is that things are difficult here."</p><p> Sylvie felt her stomach churn.  Since the time she woke up she was feeling a bad omen, checked everything she did during the day at least twice just to not make mistakes, since she was a child she learned not to ignore that feeling.</p><p> "No, Kidd, come back! No one else comes in."</p><p> " Boss…"</p><p> "Nobody else comes in, it's an order!"</p><p> Violet looked at her, the same thing showed in her face, fear!</p><p> Brett had already seen this feature in Boden, he was standing, staring at the building, holding the radio tightly in silence.  Just waiting and hoping that yours will leave in time.</p><p> "Boss… A… I… Severideee !!!!"  - I could barely hear a word, the radio squeaked and Casey's bad voice was heard.</p><p> "Casey? Answer!" - Before he could speak again, Cruz left with a small group of people, followed by Capp, Tony and two more firefighters from house 20.</p><p> "Chief, we need more hoses, there are about three victims in there, Casey and Severide are trying to reach them but the temperature and fire is rising rapidly."</p><p> "Casey get out of there, all of you, OUT NOW!"</p><p> Damn it!  Sylvie was holding on to keep from crying.  She knew that he would not obey, he would not leave anyone behind, and that did not contribute to anything with the tightness in the chest that she was feeling.</p><p> They were returning from the med and when Brett got out of the ambulance a loud noise was heard and they felt the ground shake.  The building had given way and the flames were now clearer.  Sylvie wanted to run towards her friends but found herself trapped, her legs didn't respond, nobody needed to tell her, she was sure they were inside.</p><p> "Boss, did they leave?" - Violet passed her, already asking in a slightly raised voice.</p><p> Boden just nodded his head.  "Casey, Severide? Report"</p><p> A silence stretched between them.  Everyone was upset, Casey, Severide, Ottis and Herrmann were still there.</p><p> "Boss, you need to let us in" - Cruz was close to ignoring orders and entering.</p><p> "Boss !!" - The voice she wanted to hear echoed over the radio, but before she could breathe a sigh of relief came the bad news.  "We need help, Herrman and Ottis were hit, the floor on the first floor gave way but we were in the basement."</p><p> "Cruz, Capp, Tonny. Go!"</p><p> Time moved in slow motion, it seemed to take hours what were actually minutes, some firefighters anxiously waited for permission to enter, Boden was controlling his weight, everything was unstable and he didn't need more men in danger.</p><p> "Boss I .."</p><p> "Kidd, in time, everything in time."</p><p> Anyway, Severide left supported by Capp bringing Herrmann who seemed unconscious.  The 61 girls ran towards him, quickly giving the necessary care, in a few minutes it was already possible to hear the ambulance ringing echoing towards the hospital.</p><p> "Good God, please take care of Herrmann" - Sylvie thought as she saw the ambulance leave.</p><p> "Paramedics !!! We need Paramedics" - Casey shouted leaving with a man in his arms.</p><p> Sylvie and Violet ran to him with the stretcher.</p><p> "Ottis !!" - Sylvie shouted when she saw her friend unconscious.  "Ottis dear, can you hear me? Ottis please !!" - She pressed her fingers to the larger vein on her neck "I ... I can't feel the pulse."</p><p> Violet put the wires on the equipment to check the beat.  "Brett, he's in asystole"</p><p> "No !! Start contractions" - Sylvie placed her hand over her other hand and started to massage her friend's chest.<br/>
"Come on Ottis, please… 1,2,3 .."</p><p> "Sylvie" - Violet said quietly.</p><p> "No Violet, I'm not going to lose you. Come on Ottis, you can do it, you need to do it."</p><p> "Sylvie… He's gone."</p><p> "No, I don't .." - She felt a hand on her shoulder as tears streamed down her eyes.  "No, I will not stop!"</p><p> "Syl, come here" - Casey pulled her away.</p><p> "No Casey, you can't get me out of there, Casey he needs me, Matt, please…."  - He hugged her.</p><p> "Xiiu, I need you to calm down ok ?!"</p><p> "Matt, I can't ..."</p><p> "I know… I know…" - He just held her in his arms.  No one there would judge his attitude, everyone wanted to do the same, trying to bring him back was all they wanted, but it wouldn't do any good.</p><p> While the trucks extinguished the fire, 99 had the difficult task of taking the courageous firefighter who dedicated his life to people and to serving now.</p><p> " Are you better?"  Casey rubbed both her arms up and down.</p><p> "Yes, I am. Thanks, I need to go."</p><p> "Stella is helping Violet, you drive ok?"</p><p> " No not me.."</p><p> "Sylvie, you don't have to, everyone here understands."</p><p> "Thanks, Casey," she said in a choked voice.</p><p> "We all go to the med when we leave here, we will meet there."</p><p> ****<br/>
The med waiting room had never been so quiet, even though there were more than 15 people in the room.<br/>
Everyone was lost in thought.  The day that had started like any other ended in the worst possible way.  No one is ever prepared to lose someone.  Death is usually something that is not expected, it is not something easy or simple to deal with.  Even in their profession.</p><p> Severide, Stella and Casey do not leave her side, it is as if they expected her to give in, Foster was talking softly to Mackey and Cruz was sitting with his head down in both hands.  She wanted to go to him, but she couldn't help feeling guilty about her.  The questions "What if I had continued?"  Or "What did I do wrong?"  They were hammering in their thoughts.</p><p> "You know you couldn't have done anything, do you?"  - As if he knew what she was thinking.  Matt said quietly close to her ear just for her to hear.  How was that possible?  How did he know her so well?</p><p> "I don't .." - She was interrupted by Dr. Choi who came to bring news from Herrmann</p><p> "Herrmann is fine, just a puff of smoke and a mild concussion."</p><p> "Thank God!" - Cindy exclaimed a little louder.  "Can we see him?"  .</p><p> "Of course, I just ask you to go two at a time. And maybe it would be good to keep some news out for now."</p><p> "Yes! We understand, thank you Dr.!"  - Boden said.</p><p> *****</p><p> Breaking news to Herrmann about Ottis had not been easy, as had going to the funeral.  His family was not from Chicago, so a symbolic ceremony was held in honor of him by his friends.<br/>
Cruz and Sylvie spent nights crying and remembering the moments with their friend.<br/>
After Cruz got married, Ottis had decided to live alone, something about achieving independence, so they were no longer in the same apartment, but many of his things were still there, as well as a beautiful photo of the three together when they lived together.  .</p><p> Foster helped her some nights when she couldn't sleep and since that fire she hadn't seen or spoken to Casey.<br/>
Not just Casey, but with the whole house 51, except for Cruz, Foster and Herrmann, sometimes she texted, just to find out how they were, she felt she should be around, she loved them and she owed it to them, but be  very close to them now it hurt.  Everything reminded me of Ottis and it hurt her so much.<br/>
She wanted to go to the barracks, she wanted to hug her friends.  To tell the truth she even got to go, but she stayed more than half an hour in the car standing in front of the battalion without being able to muster the courage to go down.<br/>
Imagining that house without the friend's jokes or constant smile was a terrible thing.<br/>
And at the same time, she had learned how comforting it could be to be with them, the day of the funeral had proved it, just by being around them she could feel better.<br/>
Anyway, his mind was a perfect mess.</p><p> "I really don't know what you're waiting for to get back to them."  - Violet said sitting next to her in the back of the ambulance.</p><p> "What? No ... I don't .."</p><p> "Brett, for God's sake, I love having you here, in fact we all do, but your home is not here."</p><p> "I chose that, Violet, I can't just go back. What about Mackey? 61 is complete."</p><p> "No! It's not Sylvie. You guys had a huge loss, they need you as much as you need them. Look, don't get me wrong, I don't want you to go and harm someone is also not my intention, but the family should  be where the family is to be complete. "</p><p> The alarms went off, leaving the conversation on the air.<br/>
The day had been spent on a lot of calls, but nothing major.</p><p> "Girl !!! There you are!" - Foster said coming over to them.</p><p> "Hi !!" - Brett gave him a hug.  " All right? "</p><p> "Yes, just a little intoxication."</p><p> "Ah, ours was an accident with the lawn mower."  - Violet said back.</p><p> "It must have been a lot more exciting" - Mackey joked.</p><p> Sylvie made a face.  "Exciting will be cleaning both."</p><p> "Huggh don't even remember me."  - Violet said making everyone laugh.</p><p> "See you later partner" - Foster said saying goodbye.</p><p> "Until" - Catching a look from Violet over her.  " What? "</p><p> "I said. Partner" - She made a movement of quotation marks with her hands.</p><p> "That's not it ... Ah… Let's go back, let's go!"</p><p> "Anham, I know ..."</p><p> The day ended without further calls.  Just too many reports and more reports.<br/>
What Violet said earlier was going on and on in her head "The family needs to be where the family is."  Herrmann had told her that, not only when they stayed here in house 20, but also on their visits to his house.  After the accident at the factory, she had gone to visit her friend, and he insisted that the family should not be separated.  But nothing made sense, she couldn't just say she wanted to go back and get someone out of there, could she?</p><p> Arriving home she found it strange to see Foster pacing.  She looked euphoric and concerned at the same time.  He was holding a paper that looked like a letter in his hands.</p><p> " Hey, how are you?"  - She said throwing the keys on the counter.</p><p> "You ... You won't believe it."</p><p> " What's it?"</p><p> "They took me back !!! I can't believe it!"</p><p> "Them? Them who?"</p><p> "Sylvie medical school, they want me back!"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I wanted to thank the comments, they make my day!  knowing you are enjoying me makes me very happy!  I will try to update as soon as possible.  Be safe and have a great week for everyone, see you soon!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Back</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well, I wish I had updated this before, but I just couldn't write this scene of her seeing Ottis's memorial without crying.  It always stays in my head, I definitely wanted a scene like that.  (Also go to a friend who always tells me how much she missed him, Isa, I hope you like it) I also used things from season 9, so if you haven’t seen it yet, it might contain spoilers ...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Casey had arrived earlier thanks to a small meeting with the officers, he was now outside the barracks talking to Severide.  Some things had changed and one of them was that 61 was without the responsible.  Foster had passed medical school and took everyone by surprise when he announced he was leaving.  Mackey was new, fresh out of the academy, probably the corporation would send someone, and even Boden was unaware of the situation.  The only thing they heard was that someone had already climbed and that it was someone with experience.  (This is what the Chief Paramedics told Boden and them a little earlier).</p>
<p> "I hope it is a good person, this house has suffered a lot lately." - Casey commented with his hands in his jacket pockets, with his back to the entrance and facing the lieutenant.</p>
<p> "Hey, I think it's as good as we could imagine."  - Severide said making a slight gesture with his head so that his friend looked back.</p>
<p> As he turned, Casey saw a beautiful blonde in front of the monument they had recently placed in honor of Ottis.  She was standing, looking, with her side bag over her shoulders.  Wouldn't it be possible, Sylvie was back at 51?</p>
<p> "Casey !!"  - Severide said gesturing with his head for him to go there.</p>
<p> He took the tip from his friend and went over to where she was.  From afar even he could see her wiping away some tears, it was difficult to look or be on the sacred ground, which was what they called the place without being moved.</p>
<p> "Brett, hello!"  - He said already approaching her.</p>
<p> "Casey… Hi…" - She used one of her arms to wipe her freshly wet face.  "It looks so beautiful! I bet he would have liked it."</p>
<p> "Yes, he will always be special, he deserves to be always remembered. He was a hero for us all."</p>
<p> "I still can't believe he's gone .."</p>
<p> "I'll tell you a secret, sometimes I think I hear your laughter from the battalion and when I look at it it was just an imagination."</p>
<p> "I know what you mean, I still look for him every time I see Joe."</p>
<p> "Focus on the good, Sylvie, he wouldn't want to see you sad."</p>
<p> Brett ran his hand over the sign that said, Брат, я всегда буду с тобой.  (Brother, I will always be with you.) "You are right, Ottis would not like us to be crying here."</p>
<p> " So are you back?"</p>
<p> "Oh yes !!! My God, I forgot, I need to talk to the Chief."</p>
<p> Sylvie explained that she was told late last night that she should come to 51. After her last shift at house 20 they found out that Keyla the paramedic who had been absent intended to return and Violet was more than happy to have her old partner back.  .  To tell the truth, Violet gave Sylvie a little push back to her home.  With Foster's departure she would be the most suitable and as much as leaving was her own decision, she could never say no to her home.  Of course, it goes without saying how much Boden was relieved and how well he received her after a brief meeting in his office.</p>
<p> It was strange to be back, his bed was the same (and the noises too) but it was still strange, everything seemed quieter, people looked different.  Not that they were different with her, on the contrary, as soon as they heard of her return, everyone came to embrace her and were very happy to have her back, and yet everything seemed different.  Perhaps it was the absence of Ottis or Foster, both I would say.</p>
<p> Mackey was not a total stranger, they worked together on some calls, of course, each in her ambulance, but still side by side, and she had also been to the old apartment she shared with Foster once or twice.</p>
<p> "Hey, how are you?"</p>
<p> "Yes, Mackey, thank you! Just reinstating me."</p>
<p> "I guess it shouldn't be easy, but can I say something?"</p>
<p> " Sure.!"</p>
<p> "I'm glad you're back! I mean, Foster talked so much about you and everyone around here too, even Casey highlighted your skills a few times."</p>
<p> Casey?  Usually he was not to get much praise out there, Sylvie blushed a little.  It was never your forte to receive praise.  "I bet they increased a little bit."  - She said smiling.  "I heard a lot about you too."</p>
<p> "Swear?"  - Mackey said excitedly.  "I miss Foster, but I'm happy that you're the one to take her place."</p>
<p> With that, an alarm sounded called 61.<br/> Arriving at the place, Sylvie found it strange that the door was half open, but soon they saw a man lying on the sofa, when they approached they could see that it was a probable overdose, Sylvie asked Mackey to go preparing the medication while she checked the vital signs, and while  the two were crouched in front of the man, a noise sounded behind them and another man shouted pointing a gun at them.</p>
<p> "If he dies, you two will die."</p>
<p> Okay, what a nice welcome gift!<br/> Sylvie acted on the purest instinct, she knew that the medicine that both of them brought was not enough and also that the more time they spent there, the more dangerous it could be, they quickly put the victim on the back of the both and using all their self control  mixed with adrenaline and pushed the armed man away from them, telling him to meet his sister at the Med. On the way back to the barracks, she realized the danger they were in.  Not that it was her first time, and it probably wouldn't even be a last time, she thought.  But judged by the silence of his new partner, it was probably the first time that something like this had happened to her.</p>
<p> "Are you okay, Mackey?"</p>
<p> "I am! I just ... See how you faced that man, look, Foster was right when he said you could be tough."</p>
<p> Brett river.  "Make no mistake, I probably acted on adrenaline."</p>
<p> "Adrenaline or not, I'm glad it was there. I hope I don't go through this anymore. But I'm looking forward to telling everyone how you faced that man."</p>
<p> "Maybe we better keep some details between us." - Sylvie said, parking at 61 in her usual place.</p>
<p> "You're kidding, aren't you?"  - Mackey said getting out of the vehicle and closing the door behind him.  "You were stupidly brave, you should let them know that."</p>
<p> "Let us know what?"  Casey asked.  Neither of them had noticed the captain approaching.</p>
<p> "Brett !!! She was amazing, the guy pointed a gun at us and she practically faced him, he said he was going to shoot me and .."</p>
<p> "Mackey… The details…"</p>
<p> "Wow, of course! I'm sorry."</p>
<p> "He what? Now I want to know."</p>
<p> "I'm sorry, captain, Brett is my superior" - Gianna said already taking some distance between them.  "Ask her, I'll find something to eat, if you need me I'll be in Brett."</p>
<p> "You want to know, don't you?"  - Sylvie said seeing how he looked at her.</p>
<p> "You know me well."</p>
<p> "It was no big deal, Casey, he pointed the gun at her and I asked him to focus on me. It is my duty as a responsible person to ensure her safety and furthermore she was scared."</p>
<p> "I wouldn't expect less from you, but that doesn't mean you're not worried. Did you speak to the police?"</p>
<p> "Yes, we gave our statements at the hospital. I am going to speak to the Chief."</p>
<p> "Great, but I'll call Kin if that's okay, just to make sure. Could it be?"</p>
<p> "Sure, I don't see any problem. Thanks Casey!"</p>
<p> He lightly squeezed her shoulder before giving her a smile and leaving.<br/> The bad tension between them seemed almost forgotten, since she left 51, she hadn't spent time with him, made no calls or sms and tried to be as far away as possible, but judging by how she felt now, after just minutes  talking to him, she could say it was no use.  The feelings were there, the heart kept racing every time I saw him, that vibration was firmer than ever.<br/> She wouldn't admit it to anyone, but she was scared, even if it wasn't the first time, having someone threaten her life isn't easy to deal with, and talking to Casey made her feel better, maybe that's how things should be.  be, just let it flow, if something happens it happened.  It took almost everything from her to stay away and it was no use.</p>
<p> AMBUL NCIA 61, PERSON FALLEN TO THE FLOOR.</p>
<p> Before the alarm even sounded with the address, Gianna was already running towards the ambulance and Brett was getting ready to drive.</p>
<p> Everything seemed normal until she saw a black SUV leaning against the ambulance, the car was as fast as they were and seemed to want to collide, she didn't understand anything, who would do something like that?  Maybe it was just someone looking for an excuse to cut the signals.<br/> Unfortunately his suspicions turned out to be wrong when he hit the back of the ambulance, Brett tried to accelerate even more, cut a car or two but the SUV was still firmly behind them, until he managed to stand side by side with the vehicle and that's when  she could see what it was, he was the man from the previous call, he was pointing a gun at them, for the second time in a short time.<br/> She tried to accelerate the vehicle even more, but everything seemed to pass in slow motion when it hit the side of the 61 and she lost control, colliding with the road parapet causing the ambulance to fall downhill.</p>
<p> "Squadron 3, Caminhao 81, Caminhao 51, accident involving vehicles and an ambulance in…"</p>
<p> The alarm didn't have to end for everyone to be rushing to their posts.<br/> On the way Casey remembered that 61 was on a call and that he had not returned, the call did not say which ambulance was involved in the accident and he hoped it was not her.</p>
<p> "Ambulance 61, answer" - He asked over the radio</p>
<p> "Casey, don't you think that .." - Stella asked worriedly behind the wheel.</p>
<p> "I hope not, I'm just checking… Ambulance 61, can you hear me?"</p>
<p> When truck 81 was arriving, they could see the damage from afar.  They came down the avenue, aiming to speed up the rescue, and when approaching .. "</p>
<p> "Casey is the…" - Before Stella could continue, Casey was jumping out of the vehicle.</p>
<p> "Brett… Sylviie" - He shouted approaching the ambulance.  The vehicle was overturned, the front practically destroyed and behind it I could see another vehicle that is as much or more destroyed than the 61. "Cruz, Severide, look at the other vehicle, I'm taking Brett." - He still managed to say before  get close to it.</p>
<p> "Sylvie, can you hear me?"</p>
<p> "Casey .. Help Mackey, she's bleeding."</p>
<p> He tried his best to look professionally at the scene, but all he wanted to do was get her out of there as quickly as possible.  She was conscious and responsive but her voice was weak and he could see injuries in her.  Mackey however looked worse, the side that fell off hers and he could see blood where she was, she came and went in consciousness which could indicate a more serious concussion.</p>
<p> "We need to get Sylvie out to get to Mackey" - He said.</p>
<p> "No !!! Take her out first."  - Sylvie shouted.</p>
<p> "Sylvie, I need you to stay calm, okay ?! I need to get you out of there to get to her, plus we can't take the risk of the belt opening and you falling over her. We'll get you both out, I promise!"</p>
<p> "Casey" - Severide shouted from the back.<br/> When the captain looked, Severide and Cruz had their hands up and moving away from the second vehicle, he did not understand what was happening, until he saw an armed man, pointing the gun at them.  He looked hurt and was limping from one leg, yet he came towards them screaming.</p>
<p> "DON'T MOVE! MY BROTHER DIED AND THE BLAME IS THEM, THEY DIED ALSO."</p>
<p> Turning his attention to Sylvie, even without moving, he could see that she was no longer awake.  He needed to do something, they could die right there in front of him if he didn't.<br/> He looked at Severide, waiting for his friend to take the hint and without thinking much he went over to the man.  Time seemed to stop and accelerate at the same time, he got into a physical fight with the aggressor.  "TAKE THEM OUT THERE" - Casey shouted trying to take the gun from the man's hand.</p>
<p> "NOOOOO" - The same one shouted.  And then everyone heard a loud, high-pitched shot.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>That's it, I hope you liked it, we are getting close to the end of the story, thanks to everyone who commented, favored and gave a chance.  (Remembering that some events may be in random order, it is just a story and does not exactly follow the order and the reality ok ?!) I hope all you in the next chapter, until then, be well and safe !!!  Just remember #BrettseyIsComming❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. What the hell had happened?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, I'm still not sure where it all came from, I just wanted to test different paths ...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sylvie woke up stunned, not sure where she was, of course the very bright light and the smell of antiseptics gave a little hint.<br/> Upon opening her eyes she realized that she was at ChicagoMed and that there was an intravenous linked to it.</p><p> " Welcome back."  - April said entering the room and realizing that she was awake.</p><p> "April ?! How did I get here? And where is everyone?"</p><p> "What exactly do you remember, Sylvie?"</p><p> She remembered driving fast, crashing ... "Oh my God, Mackey?"</p><p> "She's fine, she was released about five minutes ago."</p><p> "How long did I stay out?"</p><p> "A few hours ago, Dr Choi said you hit that little head hard."</p><p> April hung up and removed the access that was in Sylvie's arm.</p><p> "April, I'm not sure, it may be the target of my head, but is Casey okay? I vaguely remember a fight, I'm not sure if or what happened."</p><p> "Ah Sylvie, I'm sorry."</p><p> "Are you sorry?" - She could already feel tears forming.</p><p> "Maybe I better call Dr Choi."</p><p> "No, April. Please, what happened?"</p><p> "Sylvie, he tried to fight Halleck and .."</p><p> " Which is?"  - She was already sitting on the bed impatient.</p><p> "He fought for the gun, and ended up being hit."</p><p> "What?" - It couldn't be true, I'm sorry never indicated something good and now that.  "Is he… is he here? I mean, is he in the hospital?"</p><p> "Sylvie, I need you to calm down, okay? You suffered a serious concussion, stay calm."</p><p> " You did not answer me. "</p><p> April looked upset, she was going around to answer, she seemed to consider saying nothing, but ended up giving in when she saw tears running down the paramedic's face.  "I'm sorry Sylvie, they did everything, but he…"</p><p> "No, that's not true ... It can't be April."  - At that time she no longer controlled the crying.  "He… He needs to be fine, I… I didn't tell him .. April, please… I didn't say .."</p><p> The nurse came over and wrapped Sylvie in a hug.  "I'm really sorry."</p><p> Sylvie took a few minutes to compose herself, as soon as she was able to go two minutes without crying, she pretended to be better just so that April would leave her alone in the room, but she didn't feel well, her head was hurting and her stomach was turning, she felt a huge  cold in the belly, as if something was frozen her from the inside out and her heart ached almost physically.  Deep down she knows it wasn't her fault, but it wasn't enough to avoid the feeling of guilt that was building inside her.<br/> She saw him when he arrived, he screamed for her, she could see his worried eyes and know that she would not see them again was completely destroyed.</p><p> So many things she wanted to have the power to change, she would never have moved away from him, she would never have moved house, she should have said how she felt, she loved him and had lost him.  She ran away when she thought that feeling was so wrong and that she wasn't able to control it, she ignored it, avoided it and now she didn't have it anymore.</p><p> "Hello, Sylvie." - Dr Choi said entering the room, rubbing both hands with a little antiseptic.</p><p> "Dr." - was all she managed to say.</p><p> "April told me that you were awake. I know it's not a good time, but how do you feel?"</p><p> " I feel good."  - Lie, of course!  But she wanted to go home, be alone and cry.</p><p> "Normally I would keep you here for the night, but under the circumstances I will sign your discharge ok?"</p><p> Great, it was all she needed.</p><p> "Stella is waiting for you, promise me that you will get as much rest as you can and the least symptom will return."</p><p> "Sure, I will."  - Probably another lie.</p><p> The drive from the hospital to her apartment was done in silence, she didn't want to talk, Stella didn't seem sure what to say.<br/> Sylvie was experimenting if she was going to measure on scales, one of the biggest pains that has passed, the tears alternated in descending without permission and time and between simply drying.  Crying seemed insufficient, she wished she could scream, but even if she wasn't in the car with Stella, she felt she couldn't, the voice seemed to be contained, as if something was holding her by the throat.</p><p> "Do you want tea or something?"  - Stella said after closing the door behind her entering the apartment.</p><p> "No, I don't think I could do it."</p><p> Sylvie went to the sofa and sat down, Stella went to the kitchen and brought a glass of water with her.</p><p> "Can I ask you something?"  Brett looked at her with watery eyes.</p><p> " Sure!"  - Stella sat across from her.</p><p> "He…" - She had to stop and calm down.  "Did he suffer?"</p><p> "Hey, Sylvie… Come here."  - Stella hugged her as tightly as she could and let her cry.</p><p> "Did someone tell your family? Is anyone working things out?"  - She said between sobs.</p><p> "Severide is with his sister."</p><p> "I still can't believe it… Stella, I was so selfish, I will never forgive myself for that."</p><p> "Don't do that Sylvie, he wouldn't want you to do it."</p><p> " It hurts so much. "</p><p> "I know, honey, I know .."</p><p> Long minutes passed before she was able to control herself again, nausea was present and the feeling of several tons on her chest did not help much.<br/> Stella had walked away a little to answer the phone, it was Severide and Brett had heard something about the funeral and tribute.<br/> It was surreal, they just went through this with Ottis and now Casey.<br/> Just thinking about seeing a photo of him at a funeral meeting made him want to throw up even more.</p><p> She looked at a plastic bag with some things on top of the counter, it was her stuff, probably some of the belongings that were in the ambulance before the accident, opening it she found her cell phone and unlocked it she saw dozens of messages, some from her parents, others from  friends and one was almost lost among so many messages, it was last, and she would have ignored it momentarily if the sender had not been him.<br/> The time for the message was only a few minutes after the shift began, before the call that would change everything.</p><p> "I'm glad you're back, 51 was not the same without you"</p><p> The tears that seemed to have dried up came back with all her strength, she remembered earlier today when he went to receive her, how she looked awkward, remembered her look, her smile. It couldn't be real, like  would she live without it?  She had already dealt with many things and considered herself a strong woman, but now she didn't feel that way, Matt was her best friend, the one with whom she learned to let down her guard, to talk, damn it, the one she learned to love.<br/> She thought so much about avoiding problems in the house, constraints, and for what?  What was so much sacrifice worth?  So many sleepless nights crying in her room, every day missing being with them, all because she wanted to get away, and now ironically, she returns and that?</p><p> "Sylvie are you okay?"</p><p> "I'm so tired of being asked that. I'm alive, aren't I? I shouldn't be, but I am."</p><p> "Sylvie .." - She heard someone calling, but it didn't sound like Stella's voice anymore.<br/> "Sylvie, can you hear me?"</p><p> Why was everything suddenly dark?  She was in the living room of her apartment and now everything was cloudy.  She heard someone calling but could not answer, it is as if she were trapped inside.</p><p> Damn it!  What is happening?  She thought, tried to move or respond and it was all in vain.</p><p> "Sylvie?"  - This voice….  She knew that voice.</p><p> She felt something hold her hand, her touch was warm and familiar, but she couldn't hold it back, she couldn't see anything but a black mist, she tried with all her strength to shake the hand that held it, or to open her hands.  eyes but nothing on her body seemed to obey her.</p><p> "Sylvie, can you hear me? Just stay with us, okay?"</p><p> I can!  - She wanted to say, but the voice doesn't come out.  She knew whose voice it was, she knew that touch.  It was not possible, everyone said he was gone and now he was here, how?  Why did nothing suddenly make sense?  Why did your head hurt so much?</p><p> "Sylvie honey, can you open your eyes?"  - A female voice called for her, but this was unfamiliar, she preferred his, she wanted to hear it again.</p><p> In seconds she felt the tightness in her hand leave, she instantly missed the heat, she wanted to control but felt she was crying.  Nothing made sense and he was taking everything out of himself to keep from panicking.<br/> Where did he go?  She wanted him close, she needed him, his presence.</p><p> "Sylvie dear, it's me Natalie, can you hear me?"</p><p> What the hell!!!  She can, she would like to shout that, but what was going on?  Where was he and why wasn't he here anymore?  Why did she go back to the Med?<br/> Did she feel bad?  Did Stella bring her?  Why was Matt there?</p><p> "The pulse is weak."  - She heard.  But I couldn't understand, who were they talking about, was she?  No, she was fine until minutes ago.</p><p> "We're losing her, bring the defibrillator !!"  - It was the last thing she heard, before she got lost in the black immensity.</p><p> Everything was quiet, everything was silent ...</p><p> "We have a pulse, she is back"</p><p> Natalie?  Was that Dr. Manning?</p><p> "Sylvie, can you hear me?"</p><p> Yes, she could.  But unlike before she managed to open her eyes, the clear light made her close her eyes again.  "Matt?"</p><p> "He's out there dear, you'll see him soon." - Natalie said, running a hand over his arm.</p><p> Out there?  Was Casey alive?  What the hell had happened?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I swear I have a cute ending to this lol But I wanted to try some drama, I had something very sweet scheduled for this, but the end of that episode left me dramatized lol Let me know if you liked it ... (I have another chapter almost ready,  so I should post it later this week).  Thanks for reading and for the amazing comments!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. It has always been you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well, I received some not so happy compliments for the previous chapter, and I promised that there was a point, all the anguish was necessary to get here. This may sound like a good ending, but I would not rule out the idea of continuing.  let me know if you would like more of this story...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Waking up became strange, everything was so confusing, the painful feeling of losing someone so important was still there.<br/> Sylvie couldn't say which part was not real, which was the result of a nightmare and which was not.<br/> His head was still throbbing and a throbbing pain was coming from his chest, something was flowing through an IV in his arm and the first chance he had he would ask to increase anything, because he didn't seem to be resolving it.</p><p> She briefly considered the idea of just being quiet, maybe it was better to enjoy the time she was confused, after all, being confused was better than knowing the truth, especially if that truth included a world without Matthew Casey.</p><p> "Sylvie?"</p><p> Oh no, it could only be a joke.</p><p> "April?"  - She opened her eyes just to confirm, it was like being in one of those horror movies where you keep reliving the tragedy over and over again.</p><p> " Welcome back."</p><p> "No, please don't even continue .."</p><p> " Excuse? "</p><p> "Is it now that you're going to say you're sorry?"</p><p> "Why would I do that? We are all glad you are doing well."</p><p> " Wait for me? "</p><p> "Sylvie, what do you remember?"</p><p> Great, here we go again, she thought ..</p><p> "I remember, the accident and Mackey, I remember Casey .."</p><p> "Mackey is fine, except for some headaches, she's already been released, now, Casey."</p><p> No, please..</p><p> "Casey?"</p><p> "Look, you're already awake." - Natalie came into the room with a tablet.  "How are you feeling, Sylvie? You scared us earlier."</p><p> "I feel strange, some confused thoughts."</p><p> "After what happened, it's understandable. I'm going to ask you to retake some exams, okay ?!"</p><p> "The vital signs are good."  - April said</p><p> "This is great! I'm glad you are well. Now rest for a while, soon they will come to pick you up for exams."</p><p> "Thanks, Natalie, April .." - She wanted to ask, but imagined that if nobody commented, she had a good chance of having imagined him when he was sick.</p><p> Lying alone in the room, she imagined a thousand and one possibilities, tried to remember as much as what had actually happened, but everything was a mess in her head and the pain of having lost it too real to be something proportioned in her head.<br/> She redid some tests that Natalie had commented, refused something to eat and asked the nurse so that if it was possible to make a call, she remembered seeing messages from her parents on the cell phone before and wanted to talk to them.<br/> The lack of 51 staff was also starting to sadden her, they were always so close and it had been a long time since she woke up, but she had not seen any of them, she supposed that everyone was suffering from the latest events.</p><p> She was glad to be in a room now, leaving the ICU was a very good thing, Natalie explained that she had a severe concussion and the impact had been so strong that she had a cardiac arrest, that she had arrived practically lifeless at the hospital  and that due to her critical condition, she had sent the barracks home, claiming that Sylvie needed to rest and that morning visits would be released.</p><p> "Wait, did I come here straight from the accident?"</p><p> "That I know of, yes!"</p><p> "So I didn't get discharged and went home with Stella?"</p><p> "No, not today."</p><p> "So .. Casey?…"</p><p> "Look who I found lost out there."  - Maggie announced at the bedroom door.</p><p> When she returned her attention, she thanked herself for not being with the Machine monitoring her heartbeat anymore, because she was sure she would be reported, her heart leapt at the sight of a certain pair of blue eyes, the ones she was so sure that  had lost.</p><p> "Speaking of which .." - Natalie winked at her.  "I know that the visits would be released only in the morning, but his exam results came back good and since he is right here, I don't see any reason to send him away, do I?"</p><p> "I thank you for that!" - He spoke.</p><p> "Maggie and I will be outside in case you need to just call us."</p><p> "Thanks Natalie!"</p><p> Casey was alive!  Not only was he alive, but he was here, in front of her.<br/> Suddenly she had a sudden urge to tell him everything, to hug him and to cry at the same time, she would blame the drugs she took earlier for pain, but she knew it wasn't just that, a feeling of having received a  second (or third) chance practically screamed in his brain.  She didn't want to waste it, but she was also afraid, and if ...</p><p> She was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't even notice him approaching and sitting in a chair that was next to the bed, practically in front of her.</p><p> "Hi" - He said quietly, as if he was afraid of something.</p><p> "Hi" - She wanted to say more, but she was cowed.</p><p> "I'm so happy that you're doing well!"  - He held his coat so tightly that it seemed like his life depended on it, he seemed to be holding himself back from something, he wasn't in his "usual Casey" way.</p><p> "Would you find it strange if I said that too?"</p><p> "Are you happy to be okay? Of course not!"</p><p> "No, Casey. I mean, of course I'm happy to be alive, but I meant something else… I'm happy that you're doing well!"</p><p> "Me?" - He was confused.</p><p> "Yes! I… I think I had a nightmare or something."</p><p> "Do you want to talk about?"</p><p> She wasn't sure if she wanted to remember it all, even though he was alive and right here in front of her, the memories were painful.</p><p> "I had a feeling I saw you fighting Halleck."</p><p> Casey shifted uncomfortably in the chair.</p><p> "You did that, didn't you?"</p><p> "Sylvie, don't be mad. Look, he wanted to prevent us from getting you out of the equipment and I just couldn't let that happen."</p><p> "So you fought someone crazy and armed?"</p><p> " Yes, I did."</p><p> "Very smart of you."</p><p> What a beauty, she was nervous and couldn't control herself, but why was she so nervous?</p><p> "Sorry, Matt, I shouldn't have ... You saved me, I should be thanking you and not fighting with you."</p><p> Except that she did want to fight him, if he knew how much he thought he might have lost he hurt, he should at least be more careful.  But we're talking about Matthew Casey, she didn't expect any less from him, he was like that, always looking to help others, in fact this was largely responsible for all these feelings she had for him.</p><p> "Okay, Sylvie, you've been through a lot today."</p><p> Why did she have this strange feeling that he was different?</p><p> "Do you know if anyone spoke to my parents?"  - Yes, changing the focus of the conversation could help, at least she hoped so.</p><p> "Boden called them when they told us that you were stable. I wouldn't be surprised if they showed up here at any time. It reminds me ..." - He shifted a little so he could move his pockets.  "Here, Severide recovered earlier."</p><p> It was strange to look at her cell phone now, it looked so real when she did it in her head and saw a message from him, if it wasn't so painful, she would say that the power of imagination she had was incredible.</p><p> "Thank you, Matt"</p><p> They looked like two strangers, Sylvie was refraining from telling him everything she had imagined or dreamed of and how it made her feel relieved to see him here and he seemed to be hiding something, he barely looked her in the eye and it was unusual  .<br/> She looked at the various messages on her cell phone, texted her mother to reassure them, and it was difficult to hold back tears when she saw so many messages from her friends, she had messages from everyone at 51 and 20, Cindy and Donna and  several from Foster as well.<br/> But among so many, there was one that caught his attention, it was a different number, he was not saved in his contacts, and the area code indicated he was not from Chicago.<br/> She opened it out of curiosity and wouldn't say she was ready to read it all...</p><p> </p><p>"Girl, what a scare you gave us today huh ?! I was passing through Chicago and I heard the news when I went on a little visit to the barracks. You know, Sylvie, it is not easy to say what I am going to tell you, and maybe that is one of the things  more difficult that I will do, but I once told you that we were partners and as someone who likes you very much and also admires you, I need to do it.<br/> In all the years I lived with Matt, there were few times that I saw him so devastated, he told me he was with you in the ambulance on the way to the med when you almost left us and it broke my heart to see the sadness in his eyes.  I understand that life is full of surprises and some of them are not voluntary, they just appear and even if we fight against them, they just remain.  I know how it is, I often thought of going back and resuming the life I had left here, but it didn't feel right, even if it hurt like hell, I felt at home and I still feel, I feel that this was the mission I was born for  to do, that everything I have lived has prepared me for this.  I wish I had the courage to call you to say this personally, and who knows, one day I might (by the way, I hope I keep my number) but I am at peace with it and I hope you are happy.  If I know her well enough, I imagine how much she is holding on or blaming herself and I wanted to make it clear that there is no reason to do it, I decided to leave, and when I did I gave up everything.<br/> Not that he is a property of mine where I have any kind of power to release him or anything, but if I need to listen, I'm fine with that!  And before he says or thinks about anything, he didn’t tell me anything, in fact it wasn’t necessary, I know him as nobody, the last time I saw him I knew something was different and today his eyes reflected the love I had already seen there  sometimes, but this was no longer aimed at me.  If there is something I discovered while alive, it is that it can be too short and that second chances should not be missed, give yourself a chance, and stop thinking too much about others, I have already told you other times that you think too much!<br/> Anyway, I had to go back to Puerto Rico and I couldn't go there to see you, but I hope to hear from you soon!  "</p><p>                                              -With love, Gabby.</p><p> </p><p>Casey was sitting looking directly at her.</p><p> "Did you read that?"  - She asked.</p><p> "No, but she said she would. Do you want me to leave for a while or come back tomorrow?"</p><p> "No!… I…." - She had to dry some tears that she hadn't even realized were running.</p><p> "We don't have to say, or do anything about it right now, Sylvie. Just focus on getting well."</p><p> She understood that it probably wouldn't have been easy to see Gabby again, or have a conversation like this with her, her message was clear, but why did he still seem to be distant?  Was it too much for him?  Or did everyone and even Gabby assume wrong and he didn't match his feelings?</p><p> " May I ask you a question?"</p><p> " Sure!"</p><p> "You seem distant, what's wrong?"</p><p> " What is wrong?"  He stood up, dropped his jacket on the chair, and scratched the back of his head hard.  "Sylvie, do you realize how difficult it is to realize that you could have lost someone you care about?"</p><p> She did, but she wouldn't say that now.</p><p> "I saw you practically die in the ambulance, I… I think I never felt so scared in my life. First you suddenly decide to leave and I tried to understand and not be upset, then you come back and when I think normalcy would be back  , I was holding your hand as they struggled to bring you back to life. I just don't know how to act now, I swore I wouldn't say anything and you need to rest, which you need by the way, but I can't. "</p><p> She understood now what Gabby had said, it wasn't often that she saw him looking so sad and scared, and she wouldn't judge him, when she woke up thinking she had lost him she could be like that or more.  All she felt was a dream and as much as the pain could be almost real, she hadn't been through what he went through, to be honest, if it was the other way around, she didn't know if she could.</p><p> "Matt, look at me." - He had his back to her now, facing the curtains in the room.</p><p> When he didn't, she continued.</p><p> "I'm fine! Look at me."</p><p> He turned and broke his heart to see how shaken he was, his countenance was tired and he had tears in his eyes.</p><p> "I wouldn't know how to handle this, Sylvie."</p><p> " You do not need!"</p><p> "I know ... But that doesn't stop me from feeling awful."</p><p> "Hey, come here." - When he did, she hugged him.</p><p> He sat next to her on the bed, and for a while they stayed that way, hugging each other.  His head rested between his shoulder and his neck and he had his head resting on hers.  The heat generated between them was a reminder that they were both well and alive, and that was incredibly comforting.  They had both experienced (in different ways) the painful feeling of what it would be like to lose each other, life really had a very strange way of teaching things, or maybe they were too stubborn to learn at first, anyway the lesson had been  been too heavy and painful to pass up.</p><p> "Matt?"  - She said without moving.</p><p> " Hmm?"  - He grunted.</p><p> " It has always been you!"</p><p> He pulled away to look her in the eye, but he never broke the proximity, his hand still encircled her back.</p><p> "I had a dream, or delirium, I don't really know, but it was like I woke up before, here, and you had died. When you asked me if I knew what it was like to think I was losing someone I liked so much, I need to  let them know that yes, I know. And when I knew it could be a dream or something, I kept thinking about how you always were, the first thought when you woke up, the first person I want to tell when something happens, who was there all  the times I needed .. "</p><p> He ran another hand over her face, caressing her cheek.</p><p> "And I hope it remains, Sylvie. Because I kind of discovered that a world without Sylvie Brett is a very painful place."</p><p> She smiled at him, and he couldn't resist.</p><p> It wasn't the place he or she thought their first kiss would be, but after today, appropriate places or times were no longer so valuable, the here and now were what really mattered.<br/> He didn't deepen the kiss, there would be time for that, instead, he pulled her back to the position they were in before, kissing her was incredible and he sure wanted to repeat it many more times, but if there is something that could be  even better, it was holding her in his arms, feeling her heart beat against his, his breath on her neck like a sweet, warm reminder that he hadn't lost her today.<br/> Many things still need to be said, some need to be clarified and others just forgotten, but this is probably elsewhere and at another time.</p><p> "Sylvie?"</p><p> " Hi?"</p><p> "It's been just you for some time!"</p><p> He felt her smile against his neck and kissed the top of his head.</p><p> The famous three-word phrase hadn't been said in full but who cares?  They didn't need it, they knew the meaning behind what had been said.</p><p> After a long embrace, he was back in his chair, facing her, watching her sleep.<br/> And he felt relieved and happy for the first time in a while.<br/> He knows that they will have to face many things yet, but as long as they are together, he is sure that they will succeed.<br/> For now, the plan is not to go anywhere, hope that she will recover soon and invite her to the first of many other meetings.<br/> He smiled at the idea, it had been a long time since he had been looking forward to planning a meeting with someone, a good place, a good meal and incredible company.<br/> What else could he ask for?<br/> It's amazing how incredibly crazy one day can be, but it's also incredible the power of change that all this madness can bring, luckily , today that change was incredibly good</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Since I saw the promo, I wanted to use the phrase Sylvie said on something, but I just didn't know how, so I thought about putting it in a different perspective, that old drama followed by the good old, cute and mushy chapter lol <br/>I was happy with the repercussion  from the fanfic so I did my best to try for some of the things I would like to happen, Gabby's message is one of them, I love Brettsey but I could never hate Gabby, deep down my greatest hope is that the series will give Dawsey a good close  so that Brettsey can move on but without regret .. Anyway, thanks to everyone who has read, and the girls of my heart, I hope I redeemed myself rs <br/>A great Sunday for everyone ❤️</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I still don't know how many more chapters will be added, but I have a lot of ideas.  Suggestions and thoughts are welcome and appreciated.  Thank you all for getting here, see you soon.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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